On Tuesday, while driving out of the neighborhood I noticed a squirrel running along the opposite side of the road, getting closer and close to darting across. I was watching him anxiously preparing to swerve. Turns out, that wasn't even necessary. In the seconds took to give that stupid squirrel my attention I smacked into the curb and destroyed my tire. Gah! Really?! I spent 2 hours the next day in a car dealer getting them replaced.
Lesson learned: no more swerving for squirrels. Ever.
I really was due for new tires any day now. Guess the big guy sped up the process.
The very next day, I went out to the deck with my enormous meat-scissors (that are for cutting up vegetables around here ;) to cut off some Parsley and Chives.
We have a cute little potted garden out there that I've been more dedicated to than any other plants before. However, we've failed to succeed in growing our lettuce time and time again because the STUPID squirrels keep digging the crap out of that particular pot!
So, there it was - the squirrel - sprawled out on the top of the deck railing, surrounded by dirt from one of my pots. I look down and not only has the worthless critter tore all into my lettuce pot - again - but she's also gotten into the strawberries too.
My sane reaction? I chucked my giant scissors at her, because I'm either a secret ninja or publicly crazy, I'm always quickly assessing the fastest way to get what I want. At that moment it happened to be the death of the squirrel. Either way, my quick, though possibly irrational, decision was fruitful (just not entirely). My scissors smacked into the squirrel and knocked it off the rail.
Unfortunately, it recovered quickly and ran off. But maybe it'll associate my deck with a negative thing now.
Maybe I should rethink this vegetarian thing, because I think I'm perfectly fine with people brutally slaughtering squirrels and eating them.
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